In the dining room at Woolworths, we've got a certificate from those two moronic creatures congratulating us for getting 100% in a store assessment. To Woolworths Head Office: I am not six years old anymore- nor is anyone working in your stores, unless you have secret child labour camps- so please don't try and make our lives working for you more pleasant by having stuffed animals reward us with bits of paper. Thank you.

I've just got back from working there for six hours and am now completely shattered. Who goes out shopping on Christmas Eve anyway? Even when the front lights were turned off and we're clearly trying to usher all errant customers out of the store, people just kept coming in. I know it can be hard to remember to buy everyone's presents if you've got a large family but really, by late afternoon on Christmas Eve if you still haven't got everything, I say tough. You'll just have to calmly explain to your beloveds next morning, 'Sorry honey, daddy was a twat and couldn't be bothered to get himself sorted for Christmas in time, so you're just not getting any presents this year.' There may be tears, but I think important lessons will be learned on both sides.

The two and a half hours or so after the shop closed was spent sorting stuff out for the New Year's sale, which basically involved me trying to find something useful to do (or else do a good impression of it), management stressing out when they can't find the stuff they're meant to be putting out on shelves, and the rest of the staff getting increasingly pissed off with one another and the whole thing. I think it was designed to remove any clinging shreds of Christmas spirit from our souls which had just about survived the barrage of constant Christmas songs over the past fortnight.

Despite how annoying it has been working there over the Christmas period- especially the issue where I got told off (or rather guilt tripped/disappointed at) for not checking the schedule I was never told existed, which informed me I would be working all day both Saturday and Sunday that particular weekend, and subsequent ones up to Christmas- I think I'm going to stay once my temporary contract has ended. I doubt I'll find somewhere better, and it's not actually that bad when there aren't huge queues of grumpy customers trailing back into the aisles. They're always especially grumpy if they've been queueing for five minutes or so already, and you have to inform them that they have to go to the Entertainment Desk to get their DVDs because sorry, we just don't have magic invisible drawers filled with discs to fill their empty cases up at the front tills. IDIOTS. But there are definitely worse places to work- at least Woolies isn't demanding and there are a load of actually quite nice people my own age to talk to. Maybe I'll get my own locker and name badge (I've been Ellie for the past six weeks) if I keep on there; a girl can dream...

And MERRY CHRISTMAS for tomorrow everybody! Hope you have a great day involving the opening of wonderful presents, stuffing yourselves stupid and falling asleep in front of the TV. Love and hugs to all xxxxx

I feel like a sack of shit. Well, specifically (because creatively describing how rubbish I feel will help, honest), I feel as though some horrible little demon has sneaked into my head through my right ear canal and has drained it of all emotion, all energy and all the other little things which help make me human. Next, they have replaced this precious headstuff with cotton wool soaked in Negative Thoughts, such that I barely have the will to exist- but trying to achieve sleep would take too much effort, so I'm stuck here in a merry Hell. Dragging myself to this computer took a considerable amount of effort and was only achieved, I suspect, because after having gone to the toilet, this here desk chair is closer to my door than my bed is.

It's not surprising that I'm ill though, considering that my parents spent Friday through to Sunday lolling around on the sofa and the big leather ofice chair, respectively, swathed in blankets and duvets, croaking feebly. But the main reason it's not surprising is because I was working all day Saturday and all day Sunday at Woolworths, and got very little sleep on either of those two nights despite being shattered. Sitting at a till all day, being permanently polite and smiley and helpful, and in constant terror that something will go wrong and when I push the button no one will answer my shrill call for help and the entire queue of customers will get angry and start shouting at me is surprisingly tiring. But I did get paid by a dog yesterday, which almost makes up for it all.

Someone told me I was perfect today- rather, they muttered it under their breath, an accusation. I've been trying to figure out why things that should be compliments can end up hurting so much, even if it's a joke. I've figured it triggers the exact same response as people judging you in a nasty way- the anger that someone feels they know enough about you to make a blanket statement. And yes, I know I do this too, so don't point out that I'm a hypocrite because I know it full well and it kills me. I judge people all the time- on how they look, the way they talk, the things they say- and it's unfair, but I think that's just the way we are as people, especially a girl in an all-girls' school. I remember some scientific study which found that people are more likely to make friendships based on what they both dislike, rather than what they like and have in common. While usually this doesn't bother me, sometimes it just makes me think that our entire race is based on contempt and bitterness and spite rather than love and kindness or any of those silly things, and I'm right in there with everyone else, being a bitch and enjoying it. And I'm scared that, given time, I won't be able to remember the nice stuff. I complain because I can't think of anything else to say.

In short, I'm far from bloody perfect- I'm stubborn, I'm cowardly, I can be incredibly selfish and half the time I feel I'm faking some aspect of my life, so that sooner or later a God I don't believe in is going to bring his wrath down in me because He doesn't like fakers. And yeah, sometimes I wish this would happen sooner rather than later because I get sick of pretending- even if honesty would hurt even more.

Now if you don't mind, I'm going to go loll around on my bed, swathe myself in my duvet and croak feebly.

The Dr Who Milk Chocolate Advent Calendar (Updated daily)

***EDIT*** Okay, this is ridiculous. Some of these answers you'd only know if you'd seen each episode at least three times, carefully memorising the names of each individual alien species, planet and other tit-bits of information, then had a weekly test on it to ensure it remained in your memory. I don't think that's a healthy initiative to install in the minds of the British youth. Yes, I am just sore that I don't know all the answers.

Day 2
Question: Which city did Margaret Slitheen plan to destroy using a nuclear reactor?

Day 3
Question: Which alien race took part in The Christmas Invasion?

Day 4
Question: Which silver creatures were originally human but replaced their bodies with machinery?

Day 5
Question: Which small blue alien was a guest at The End Of The World?

Day 6
Question: On which planet do the dogs have no noses?

Day 7
Question: What is Rose's surname?

Day 8
Question: What is the name of Rose's boyfriend?

Day 9
Question: Which creature controlled the shop window dummies that tried to conquer Earth?

Day 10
Question: What happened to the Doctor when he absorbed the time vortex?

Day 11
Question: What is the name of the robot dog that used to travel with the Doctor?

Day 12
Question: Which famous author did the Doctor & Rose meet in Cardiff in 1869?

Day 13
Question: Which century is Captain Jack from?

Day 14
Question: What is the name of the device that allows the TARDIS to look like a Police Box?

Day 15
What is the name of Rose's father?

Day 16
What race does the Doctor belong to?

Day 17
What does TARDIS stand for?

Day 18
Who is the last survivor of the human race?

Day 19
What message did Rose send throughout time?

Day 20
What did the Editor call the Mighty Jagrafess of the Holy Hadrojassic Maxarodenfoe?

Day 21
Which evil creatures fought against the Time Lords in the Time War?

Day 22
Where do the Slitheen come from?

Day 23
What is the name of Rose's mother?

Day 24
Who became Prime Minister after helping to defeat the Slitheen invasion?

Happy advent everybody! I can't remember what advent was originally about (something to do with people going to visit the soon-to-be baby Jesus maybe? I'm really not sure...) but now, of course, what advent really means is chocolate advent calendars. For the three years preceeding this one, my father has bought me the same Mars advent calendar which, while containing tasty chocolate, had gotten rather boring after the first two years of it. Also, the standards have gone down: where before there were three fun-sized Mars bars to enjoy over the run-down to the big day, lately this number has diminished to a mere one fun-sized Mars bar on Christmas eve.

So, naturally, I complained a little when my father produced exactly the same stupid calendar this year as I had had for so many others. Except this time, he actually listened to my moaning, and behold the results!


My advent calendar is SO MUCH better than yours.

Maybe it's not the same for all days, but today I got a Doctor Who related question on the back of the door, with the answer hidden underneath the question. I have decided that on each day that I get one, I will type out the Doctor Who related question for the joy of someone to answer in the Comments. This one is ridiculously easy, and I suspect they all are, so no excuses for not getting them correct.

Doctor Who Milk Chocolate Advent Calendar, Day 1
Question: Which captain did the Doctor & Rose meet in World War 2?

If enough people bother to play, I'll give a prize to the person who, at the end of advent, has been the first to post the correct answer most times. I'd also be curious to hear what advent calendar you have, what shaped chocolate you got and any other advent calendar related news you'd like to share.

In other, rather sadder news, I believe my desk lamp is broken. Thinking the bulb had died last week, I replaced it with a new and shiny bulb; however, the light continues to flicker occasionally with a 'FZZZZZZUP' noise, occasionally winking out altogether, requiring the lamp to be switched off then back on again in order to revive it. This is not the normal behaviour of a brand new bulb. It must therefore be concluded that the lamp itself is at fault. It is not a particularly pretty lamp, but I have had it a long while, and it has an 'AKIRA?' sticker on it, so it has sentimental value. While it may be replaced with a new, better, more stylish lamp, this old black lamp will always hold a special place in my heart.